And although there’s no single, simple solution, there are a few things that might help you gain perspective and – with time – begin to accept what’s happened.The process of getting over the end of a relationship often mirrors the famous ‘loss cycle’.

) If you want to slow things down without cooling off completely, there are a few things you can do.

First, everyone is aware of the certain ‘steps’ involved in progressing a relationship, and one way to slow down the fast moving relationship train is to take your time with these. ), or spending the night on a weeknight, or going to work parties—these are all things you can avoid either casually or by saying something more direct about not being ready for that.

Eventually, after many threats to break up, I became fed up and cheated.

It was only once, with someone who was happy to hold my hand and treat me with kindness, but once is enough.

This cycle ends with ‘acceptance’ – being able to understand and acknowledge the truth of a situation, even if it’s painful.

However, this is often much easier to understand in theory than it is to accept emotionally. You may go over and over things in your head, thinking that if you’d just done one thing differently then the outcome might have been different.

In relationships it really is true that patterns develop early on and if you don’t want this to be one, nip it in the bud, or bid that bud farewell.

But back to the good gal/guy you’re seeing (let’s be optimistic, shall we?

We were both wounded, and we needed to believe in forever-lasting love. We fought about how much more I needed him than he needed me.